News

Grand Opening

I’m so excited to be sharing this project!

It’s been several years in the making, slowly developing from something I did for myself to something I shared with my partner to something I can’t not share with you all.

Sexual health and wellness are really important to me, all the more so because mine started out so poor. (‘Purity culture’ kids, holla back!)

This project is all about putting forward a playful, imaginative approach towards sex and intimacy. Play and imagination were such effective antidotes to the shame and gravitas that characterized my early sexual experiences, and I hope you’ll find them therapeutic too!

I strongly considered going the traditional publisher route for sharing these stories (you’ll find full-length, carefully edited novels here) but there’s one key reason I didn’t.

I want this project to be something that a younger me would have stumbled upon, like I stumbled across oglaf.com, I Roved Out, and so many others.

Sexual health should be a right, not a privilege, and so for that reason also it was important to me that these novels be available for free.

That being said, I do have goals that you can help support! I’ve launched a Patreon page and have my sights set on making eBook and print-on-demand versions available. At Patreon you’ll find WIP updates, Q&A, exclusive voting, and more.

To see my ongoing and completed projects, head over to The Cookie Jar.

I’ll be posting regularly, so if you want notifications for the latest posts you can follow on Patreon, Twitter (@BakeSmut), or subscribe below.

Thanks for stopping by the kitchen, and hope to see you around! ☺

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News

Available Now! Frisky Frolicking: Tails from Honeysuckle Farm

Embry Kastel is a journalist with a passion for the stories of the chronically dismissed and underestimated. And though the city where she lives bills itself as a utopia where humans, minotaurs, satyrs, centaurs, harpies and other exo-sapiens can live in harmony, Embry knows there’s more to the story—like Honeysuckle Farm, which isn’t a farm at all.

The exo-founded women-owned independent business offers specialized intimate health services to the many exos under-served by the city—all with a winsome farm-themed twist.

The first human ever allowed behind the “Staff Only” door, Embry is eager to tell the story of the farm’s eclectic staff and clients—if she can avoid becoming too hot and bothered to function.

FRISKY FROLICKING: TAILS FROM HONEYSUCKLE FARM is an erotic novella (33k words total) featuring monster/monster and human/monster encounters. With an imaginative, playful tone and charming characters, it’ll keep you rocking on the edge of your seat from cover to cover.

Get your copy here!

Content advisories available here.

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News

Newsletter launch!

We keep trying new things, so I’ve launched a newsletter with Buttondown. 🙂 I think this will be easier for me to keep up with than Patreon or formal blog posts, so I’m looking forward to being able to give more frequent updates (and newsletter exclusives!)

Book launch posts and major news (in addition to reviews and other content) will continue to be posted to this blog, and the newsletter will be where I post about ARC sign-ups, sneak peeks, cover reveals and more.

Sign up here:

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Musings

How to Write Great Smut, Spice and Sex Scenes

Smut has a reputation for being poorly written, and I think that’s a shame. First off, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with a bit of messy fun. And secondly, it’s extremely possible to write immersive, smooth, well-crafted spice.

Here are some tips on how to do so.

Choose Your Audience

This is the most critical step. Broadly, we can think about three different levels of audience for smut, and how you’ll approach each is very different. You can write for yourself, a niche, or for general appeal. Once you know your target audience, you can tailor the rest of the tips from there.

Writing for yourself

This is a very valid option, and plenty of readers will enjoy your own self-indulgent expressions. When writing for yourself, ignore all the advice here except for what resonates with you. Get as weird, cringe, or derivative as you want.

Writing for a niche

The niche you’re aiming for will help determine your content, word choice, and approach. Crucially, different niches will have their own fetishes. Most monster fuckers won’t blink at a fluid kink, nor will a mafia romance aficionado clutch their pearls at a hand necklace. The yum vs yuk line is going to vary by niche.

Writing for general appeal

This is sort of your classic romance sub-plot. Explicit spice is getting more and more acceptable in other genres, but authors may still want to err on the safe side and make their sex scenes as smooth and appealing as possible. This also necessarily results in relatively shorter sex scenes with fewer kinks represented–so I don’t really write for general appeal, personally.

Borrow from action writing

A lot of tips that work for action writing work for spice. Rhythm and flow are especially important for immersing readers. Short, choppy sentences and phrases signal urgency, while longer, smoother passages can give a sensual feel or build tension.

I find that borderline run-on sentences focused on sensory details work well as a lead-up to a climax. The tension of “when will this sentence end?” lines up perfectly to the scene.

Finding and studying particularly well-written action sequences can be great inspiration for writing smut.

Be careful with common “ick” words

Know common “ick” words and (generally) avoid them. This is where knowing your audience helps a lot, since some niches will have opposite opinions on certain terms.

It is impossible to avoid ick words for everyone, but there are some common un-favorites that break immersion like: moist, slit, slick, rod, meat, ooze, etc, especially when combined with each other.

Avoid these over-used euphemisms unless they fit your style/period: member, flower.

Onomatopoeia (plap, glorp, etc) should generally be avoided, unless writing with a more lighthearted, silly tone.

Keep your genital nouns simple

Consider your vulvas and/or penises like characters—they get one noun (fit it to the tone of your style/story) and pronouns. Additional nouns are almost always distracting and come off as silly. You probably wouldn’t use eight different nicknames for the same character in the same scene, for the same reason. Variety comes from sentence structure (see above) and verbs (next tip).

An aside on naming genitals

It’s subjective, but I personally prefer to use cunt and cock as my words of choice. Pussy and dick are also classic and minimally distracting. Vulva, vagina, and penis usually come across as a bit too medical, with the exception of using “vulva” to correctly describe external genitals. Note that “vagina” applies only to the internal canal, and you’ll win friends by using it correctly.

Vary your verbs

When you keep your nouns simple, verbs carry the bulk of the tone and variety. So, the sound, feel, and connotations of your verbs are important.

Verbs that are immediate and sensory help with immersion, think: gasp, grip, explore, brush, thrust, pulse, ache, gush, etc.

These are overused, so be sparing: pound, destroy, claim, shatter, etc. (building up to a single definitive use of these can be powerful).

Harsh words to keep to harsh/kinky scenes: wheeze, choke, gag, slap, split, spit, etc.

Take your time

Good spice resembles good horror—both evoke tension and emotional release. We hate how long a scary movie keeps us at the edge of our seats—but we love it too.

Edge your reader. Let them really sink into the scene. Add an emotional question or dilemma to up the stakes and tension. Focus on sensory details.

And don’t rush the climax. Align the emotional and physical, let it be an epiphany, let your reader spend a long moment there and then take your time on the come-down.

Put it all together to show not tell

Before: “He inserted the key into the lock and turned”

After: “The key was heavy in his hand, ready. The lock was a perfect fit, a whisper of friction promising a delicious turn. He could feel the click of each mechanism through the warm metal, then the rush of air around the edges as the door inched open with a sigh from its hinges.”

See? ☺️

Note how “key” and “lock” still only appear once, and sensory details fill in the rest.


What would you add? Anything you disagree with? Want to see more like this? Let me know in the comments!


Craving more sweet stuff? You can read more of my musings here, and if you’re interested in reading my erotica, head over to The Cookie Jar!

To get content fresh out of the oven, follow me on Twitter or Patreon or subscribe to the blog here:

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News

New Release – Under a Monstrous Moon (Free eBook)

It’s a full moon on Halloween near Salem, and the veil between worlds is thin. Monsters appear and magic comes to life, making for an unforgettable Halloween. Snuggle in with these five stories that will get your heart racing and send a chill down your spine—but not because they’re scary.

A Voracious Vampire (F/F) – A solo movie night takes an erotic and kinky turn when Mack invites the beautiful and mysterious stranger Dahlia across her threshold.

A Winsome Werewolf (M/F) – Rowan tries to hide his surprising transformation, but his girlfriend Jessie has a few tricks in mind for this good boy.

A Gregarious Ghost (M/M) – Ethan’s ghost-hunting trip to a haunted house puts him in position to help Keith the ghost with his seriously pent-up unfinished business.

A Wistful Witch (M/F) – Chloe’s witch costume becomes a little too literal when her love potion actually works, and long-time crush Levi winds up under her spell.

A Devout Demon (F/F Orgy) – Lilura didn’t mean to summon an actual demon, but when the Baphomet climbs out of her summoning sigil, it’s more than happy to give the six women a very good night.

UNDER A MONSTEROUS MOON is a collection of five steamy shorts (3-4k words each, 17k words total) featuring queer love, alluring monsters, and HFN guaranteed.

Download for free or review the content advisories here.

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News

Preview – Halloween Collection 2023

Throughout the month of October, I’ve been releasing Halloween shorts on AO3. Now that they’re all finished, I’ll be aiming to put out a free eBook collection, hopefully before the end of the month.

You can read the collection on AO3 now!

It’s a full moon on Halloween near Salem, and the veil between worlds is thin. Monsters appear, magic comes to life, and for all involved it becomes an unforgettable Halloween. Snuggle in with these five stories that will get your heart racing and send a chill down your spine–but not because they’re spooky. 😉

A Voracious Vampire (F/F) – A spooky movie night in takes an erotic and kinky turn when Mack invites the beautiful and mysterious stranger Dahlia across her threshold.

A Winsome Werewolf (M/F) – Rowan tries to hide his surprising transformation into a werewolf, but his girlfriend Jessie has a few tricks in mind for this good boy.

A Gregarious Ghost (M/M) – Ethan’s ghost-hunting trip to a haunted house ends with him helping Keith the ghost with his seriously pent-up unfinished business.

A Wistful Witch (M/F) – Chloe’s witch costume becomes a little too literal when her love potion actually works, and long-time crush Levi winds up under her spell.

A Devout Demon (F/F Orgy) – Lilura didn’t mean to summon an actual demon, but when the Baphomet climbs out of her summoning sigil, it’s more than happy to give the six women a very good night.

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News

New Release – The Gentle Dark

Professor Rosalyn Greenwood just wants to continue her rare species research in peace. But when a supposedly extinct werewolf appears, she volunteers to study him—even if it risks her career.

Jules Abbot was perfectly content with his predictable life and boring job at the bank. But when he wakes up in the basement of the Museum of Natural History, he must face his inner demons or live the rest of his life behind bars.

As Rosalyn and Jules investigate Jules’s curse, they learn that lycanthropy spreads not through bites, but through a much more intimate act… complicating matters with Rosalyn’s prudish colleagues.

If Rosalyn and Jules don’t crack the curse in time, they’ll lose their futures—and each other.

***

The Gentle Dark is a short monster/human romance novel (52k words) in a lightly magical Victorian/Steampunk setting. Featuring high heat and neurodivergent main characters, The Gentle Dark explores themes of intimacy, stigma, loneliness, love, and facing your shadow.

Detailed content advisories are available on the author’s website.

Get your copy here!

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Shorts

The Krampuslauf (Part III)

Continued from Part II


The man gave no answers to Ylva’s continued protests.

The temperature dropped rapidly, becoming a chill so sharp it dragged icy claws across Ylva’s skin. She pounded her fists against the Krampus’s back, all she could manage from inside the rough sack.

“Hey! Where are you taking me?! This isn’t funny anymore!”

“Why, I thought you of all people would remember the legend.”

“What?”

“I’m dragging you to Hel, you naughty little wolf.”

A different kind of chill ran down Ylva’s spine. She clutched the rosemary that still hung at her breast. For a moment, she believed him. How else would he know her name? Ylva meant wolf—chosen for her even before her name day because she’d bite any finger in reach.

But then, the far more plausible explanation occurred to her.

“My mother put you up to this, didn’t she? Whatever she offered you, I promise I can make it worth your while to put. Me. Down!”

Ylva gave one last might struggle—to absolutely no avail.

Krampus chuckled. “That’s one way to stay warm. Don’t worry, we’re almost there.”

Snow crunched, and another bird called, but not one that Ylva had ever heard before—and she’d gone on countless treks out into the wilds around the village, before her mother had banned her.

Something was very wrong. Ylva quieted to listen.

Krampus paused, wood creaked, and then warmth air surrounded Ylva. The burlap sack shifted, and the ground rose to meet Ylva’s knees as a beam of heat washed across her back.

She fought with the sack, clawing at the opening until the burlap fell around her and her senses struggled to take it all in.

She was in a cabin, similar to the ones in her village, but somehow utterly foreign. The walls were made of wood, but with a silvery color and a strange swirling grain that Ylva had never seen before. The floor was layered with fur rugs of creatures larger than any bear, and blankets woven with runes draped over wood-and-leather furniture. A fireplace crackled behind Ylva, the source of the bone-warming heat.

The cabin smelled like dry herbs, firewood—and musk, vanilla, and pine.

“Better?” Asked Krampus, half-chuckling, from where he sat in a chair by the fire. 

As soon as Ylva saw him in the light, she knew. There were no clothes under his furs, no other face under that goat-like one. The horizontal pupils of his eyes were not paint—they contracted as he looked towards the fire. His double-jointed legs ended with hooves, the source of his supernatural grace and speed.

He was exactly as Auntie Helda had described—dreadful and beautiful. His fur was dark like pine bark, his horns and snout and beard like a mountain goat’s, his eyes as watchful and predatory as a wolf’s. The long tufted tail that flicked at an itch on the back of his calf was like a bull’s. 

“You’re real,” Ylva murmured.

“Of course I’m real,” Krampus—the real Krampus—replied. “What else would I be?”

“You’re not a man. You’re a… a monster.”

“Is that so? I thought monsters were supposed to be terrifying? You don’t seem very terrified.”

Ylva’s eyes darted around, clocking her potential escape routes. But she’d felt that bitter cold and knew that even with her coat, she wouldn’t last long in that kind of chill. Besides, how was a mortal supposed to get from Hel back to their own realm?

Ylva returned her eyes to Krampus’s face, searching for some clue as to his intentions.

He leaned down and held a clawed, fur-backed hand to her. “You don’t have to sit on the floor,” he said.

She carefully took the hand, and he pulled her to her feet. 

“Tch. Your hand is like ice,” he said.

“Yes,” Ylva said, with the patience of explaining to a toddler. “It is very cold outside.”

“Apparently.”

Ylva almost thought she saw remorse on his face, but he didn’t say anything. She stood there for a moment, searching his eyes, then turned and sat across from him, pulling a blanket over her lap. It was a deep navy, embellished with constellations in the shape of runes.

“Do you like that?” Krampus asked. “I knit it myself.”

Ylva’s eyes darted to the rest of the blankets, and sure enough, there was a basket with skeins of yarn and knitting needles sticking out of the top.

Something leaped out from beyond the basket, and Ylva yelped—

But it was only a tabby cat—albeit one with eight legs and two tails.

“Oh, don’t mind Magni. He’s only a terror to the mice around here.”

Magni sauntered over, eight legs working in mesmerizing unison, sniffed at Ylva’s feet, then leaped into her lap and started purring.

She pet him gingerly, worried he might do worse than nip at her if he was displeased.

“So this is Hel,” Ylva said.

Krampus nodded. “Part of it, anyway. My vacation home. I’ve got a whole castle, too. It’s very grand.”

“Oh, I’m sure. Is that where you keep the other naughty women you’ve kidnapped?”

“Why? Are you the jealous type?”

“Maybe.”

“Good. I like being fought over.”

A new kind of thrill fluttered around Ylva’s rib cage.

“Who said I even wanted you that badly?” she snapped.

Krampus wrapped a long tongue around the clawed fingers that had worked Ylva’s cunt so thoroughly.

Ylva couldn’t tear her eyes away, not even to make a point.

Krampus shrugged as he lowered his hand. “I quite remember you begging me to fuck you, that’s all.”

“And you didn’t,” Ylva said. “Not really.”

“You seemed satisfied anyway,” Krampus said.

“Hmph. So now what?”

“First, we make sure you don’t freeze to death—which can still happen in Hel, by the way. And then we resume your punishment. After all, you’ve been very naughty.”

Ylva gripped the blanket tightly as her cunt throbbed.


Krampus insisted that Ylva drink not one but two mugs of a sweet spiced drink he called ‘hot cocoa’ before he was sure that she was no longer going to die of hypothermia. The cocoa was a bit like mulled wine, but with an earthier taste and none of the sourness of alcohol. She could get used to Hel.

“Now, there’s something you should know,” Krampus said. “If you beg me to fuck you again… I will. Eventually. But you should know—once I do, you won’t be able to return to the mortal realm. Or, more accurately, you won’t want to.”

Ylva snorted. “Confident, aren’t we?”

“I have a perfect record so far,” Krampus purred.

Ylva narrowed her eyes, but a smile tugged at her lips. “What is that, like three women?”

“Oh, hundreds. Thousands, over the years. And just as many men, too.”

That made Ylva want to turn and sprint out the front door—not out of any sense of fear, but just to wipe the smirk off of Krampus’s caprine snout.

“I’ve never met a man that could satisfy me,” Ylva said.

“I’ve never met a creature I couldn’t satisfy,” Krampus countered.

“Well, let’s just see about that.” Ylva set down her mug.

Krampus peered over to confirm that it was indeed empty, then un-crossed his legs. “But first, you need to be punished,” he said, patting his thigh.

Ylva crossed her arms. “Or what?”

“There’s no ‘or what’. Disobedience simply isn’t an option.”

“Why don’t you—”

Krampus stood and was upon Ylva before she could even get her feet on the floor. He hoisted her by her under-arms and then spread her across his lap, one hand on the back of her neck, the other gripping her hip.

Ylva wriggled, her heartbeat rising along with the throbbing in her cunt, and strange sparks of pleasure tingled in her core as Krampus easily held her in place. She pounded her fists against the sides of his leg, finding iron-hard muscles under the fur.

In one deft motion, he caught both of her wrists in his hand, holding her arms out ahead of her so that she couldn’t get leverage to push up off of his lap.

Ylva panted, letting her strength build again and thinking through what she could do next—

And then his hand collided with her ass.

Ylva gasped, and the shock reverberated up her spine. Just when she could breathe again, his hand slammed into her other cheek, arching her back again and then evening out the stinging heat.

The strange tingling crept up her neck. Maybe if she—

His next slap was so hard that her feet lifted off the ground as her body curled, trembling and tensing for the next strike, which quickly followed.

Ylva half-sobbed and all she could think was that it hurt so good. The tingling reached up around her ears and then pulled her head down, down. She was sinking and floating at the same time, and the muscles of her arms went slack, no longer pulling at Krampus. He let her arms settle against his leg, but kept her wrists circled in his hand.

“Naughty girls get punished,” he crooned. “Do you understand?”

If these were the consequences, she was hardly going to change her behavior—she knew that much. As his hand lifted, she braced for the next impact, but it didn’t come. Her body quivered needily.

Krampus leaned down so that the soft fur of his snout brushed against her ear. “I said… naughty girls get punished… do you understand?”

And then she did. If she kept up her behavior, she could expect—nay, count on—this delightful consequence. He’d never intended for her to behave. Ylva wriggled eagerly, then nodded.

“Good,” Krampus said. “I wouldn’t want you to get the wrong idea.”

She listened for him to say more, so the next slap surprised her, and Ylva’s breath heaved, every exhale a moan.

Krampus’s cock pressed into her stomach again, and Ylva would have reached around to stroke it, if he wasn’t still holding her wrists—and if she wasn’t so dizzy. A series of lighter slaps let her float in the strange place and enjoy it. Then, just when the string became too much, Krampus gave her one last slap and then cupped her ass gingerly.

“This leaves such a nice mark on you,” he purred.

Ylva squirmed with pleasure at the thought of scratches from the birch interwoven with Krampus’s hand-prints.

“See,” she said, “I got through my punishment without begging you to fuck me.”

Krampus laughed a cruel, long laugh. “Oh, my naughty little wolf… your punishment is just beginning.”

His fingers plunged into her cunt without warning, sending her whole body shaking. He quickly found her spot and pressed hard, and Ylva had no idea how something that felt so good could be so unbearable.

She tried to pull her hands out of his wrist, or to wriggle off his lap, but every sharp press of his fingers made her spine weak.

Ylva gulped like a fish out of water, flopping uselessly in his lap as he drove her mad with that unbearable pleasure.

Time unraveled, and finally she whimpered, “Please…”

“Please what?” Krampus said. “You’ll need to be more specific.”

He pressed hard and Ylva’s back arched, breath hissing out of her before she could form another word.

She just needed his cock, any cock inside of her. She just needed him to fuck—

No. No, she wasn’t going to beg him to fuck her. She had a point to make.

“Just ‘please’?” He teased. “Oh, you must mean that you want to please me? What an excellent suggestion.”

Krampus shoved Ylva’s hips off of his knees and she thudded into the thick carpet at his feet—or, hooves, really.

He pulled her hands towards his stomach, so that she kneeled before him, eye-level with his cock—and she couldn’t help but marvel.

The throbbing length was burgundy in color, almost human in shape but subtly different in the curves, especially the rounder glans and swell of the center of the shaft. As thick as her wrist, it would stretch her in the most delightful way…

No. She didn’t need it, didn’t want it.

Krampus tugged at her wrists, pulling her towards his cock.

Ylva grimaced.

“We can go back to your punishment, if you’d prefer,” Krampus said.

 She couldn’t take even a single spank or a solitary second more of teasing, so Ylva brought her tongue up the length of his shaft and closed around the tip.

“That’s what I thought,” Krampus said.

Ylva wanted to wipe that smug look off of his face, but she scrapped all the ideas that would have brought her back over his lap.

The only option that remained—and a thought that made heat quiver up from her cunt—was to so overwhelm him with pleasure that he forgot to be smug.

Ylva moaned and took Krampus’s cock as deep into her throat as she could, then swirled her tongue under his tip and bobbed her head.

Krampus hummed approvingly.

Ylva took him deep again, then again, until her eyes watered and her drool ran down his cock and into his fur.

“My my, aren’t you enthusiastic? Maybe your punishment is finally working.”

Ylva nearly bit his cock, but she steadied herself. Sending him over the edge like this was still her best shot at winning.

“I suppose I could lend you a hand,” he said, releasing one of Ylva’s wrists.

Her first thought was to plunge it into her own cunt, but as soon as it dropped beneath his balls, Krampus said, “Ah-ah. You know what that hand is for.”

Ylva harrumphed around his cock, then wrapped her hand around the base of his shaft, pumping in time with her mouth.

“That’s a good girl,” he crooned.

The words should have lit a fire in her, but instead they settled around her shoulders like a heavy, soothing blanket. The genuine desire to just bring him pleasure overwhelmed her. Her eyes drifted shut, and she lost herself in the rhythm.

Krampus hummed approvingly and stroked her hair.

Just when her jaw was almost too sore to continue, he cupped her cheek.

“Now,” he said. “Aren’t you getting a bit warm?”

Now that he mentioned it, she realized that her tunic and skirt were soaked with sweat under her coat. She was still in the fireplace’s beam, and Krampus’s teasing had her burning from within.

“Let’s get you out of these wet things.”

Krampus cupped his hand under the wrist that he’d been holding and helped Ylva to her feet. She was so dizzy and light with pleasure that it took all her focus just to stand.

Gently, Krampus lifted her coat off her shoulders, brushing his claws down her arms.

She stood, still in a sort of trance, as he unbuttoned her tunic and her skirt and peeled the wet fabric away, revealing first her bare breasts and then her hips, until she was totally naked.

Normally, she could hardly get half a breast out before whatever boy she was with bent her over—and she wasn’t complaining. She enjoyed that urgency.

But this was… something else entirely. Krampus really took her in, watching the firelight glimmer on her skin.

She watched the flames dance in his amber eyes, around those strange horizontal pupils.

“Beautiful,” he murmured. One of his clawed fingers hooked under her chin and angled it upwards. “Absolutely beautiful.”

His other hand trailed down her shoulder and cupped her breast, thumb brushing over her sensitive nipple and drawing a gasp.

The sound seemed to draw his attention, and the hand at her chin clamped around her jaw, lightly pressuring her throat.

“You humans,” he breathed. “So fragile… so lovely…”

One of his claws hooked into the cotton cord around her neck, snapping it. He lifted the little spring of rosemary. “Was this supposed to protect you from me?” He chuckled.

“Or just to smell nice,” Ylva murmured.

His nostrils flared. “You smell delicious.”

He leaned down until the tip of his snout, soft as kid leather, brushed against her nose. Her eyes fluttered shut, and he kissed her, and she kissed him back. Every little brush of skin against skin was some new and wonderful thing, and her fingers burrowed into his fur as his dug into her flesh.

Every touch, every taste left her wanting more, more, more, and she grasped and moaned and pulled. Eventually she leaned back to catch her breath and Krampus’s nostrils flared as he snorted a hot breath across her face, his long tongue catching against her collarbone and trailing up her neck, her cheek.

She moaned and shuddered, cunt throbbing, wetness from her prior punishments running down her inner thigh.

Her fingers grasped the fur of his chest.

“Fuck me,” she whispered. “Please.”

“That doesn’t sound like begging,” he growled, claws digging into her ass.

“Please,” she breathed. “Please, please!”

“Or what?”

“Or I’ll faint! Please!”

“Why?”

“Because I want it…” She tugged at his fur.

“Want it?” He hissed in her ear, sending icy claws down her spine.

“Need it!” She whimpered. “Please, pleaseplease…”

“What a needy, naughty little thing,” he growled, grabbing her by the hips and spinning her, pushing her over the back of the nearby leather couch. The top was well-padded, and her toes just barely touched the ground.

Ylva wriggled, and Krampus’s hands clamped around each of her ass cheeks, claws digging in and making her back arch.

“Please, please I need it, I—”

And then he was inside of her, and every fiber of her being sang yes.

And there was more of him, and even more, and the stretch fulfilled her in a way that she had never known possible, pressing hard against her spot even though he wasn’t moving.

She clenched reflexively around him, her toes curling as her pleasure redoubled.

Krampus groaned lowly. “Fuck, you feel good. So nice and tight for me… I can tell you practice.”

“Please,” Ylva whimpered. “Fuck me, please.”

Krampus growled and his hips bucked forward, not entirely under control. But Ylva was too lost in her own bliss to feel smug—he was all the way inside of her, and it was everything.

Each of his thrusts pounded into her spot, and she transcended to a whole other level of incomprehensible pleasure. Every stroke was as sweet as a climax and her every breath was a needy moan.

Krampus held her around the waist, pulling her hard into the bottom of each stroke. She desperately wanted to cum and yet didn’t want it to ever end.

Her wetness ran down between her thighs, mingling with her sweat and pooling between her toes.

Krampus’s breathing accelerated and Ylva’s heartbeat rose with it.

He stroked faster, harder, and every stroke radiated heat through Ylva’s core. The dizzy buzz hit her as hard as mulled wine on an empty stomach, and Ylva floated on heat and pleasure.

“Yes,” she breathed, “Harder, please!”

Krampus obliged, though whether for his pleasure or hers, she didn’t know and didn’t care. Her moans raised to the pitch of the cats fucking in the barn.

“Harder, ha—hah!”

He pounded her so hard that she couldn’t speak, couldn’t think. His cock inside of her was her whole awareness, her entire world.

And then he growled one last feral sound and slammed in to the hilt, wrapping his arms around Ylva’s chest and surrounding her in fur and musk.

His cock throbbed inside of her and more heat ran down the inside of her legs. Ylva lost track of how long he came for, but it was long enough for her own heart rate to settle, for her mind to sink into a fuzzy contentment even though she hadn’t cum herself.

Krampus, still hard, stroked a few more times. Ylva whimpered, her weight sinking into his arms around her chest.

“What a good girl,” he whispered in her ear. “I think you’ve earned a reward.”

Before Ylva could wonder what it would be, she was back in her chair by the fire, Krampus kneeling in front of her, her thighs hooked over his shoulders.

His long tongue plunged into her cunt, the pebbled texture dragging against her clit. Ylva’s back arched and her fingers dug into the wooden arm of the chair.

“F-fuck, that feels good…”

Krampus leaned back for a moment and licked the mixture of cum and slick from his snout.

“Good. It’s a reward, after all.”

He plunged in again, and Ylva was already on the edge. His soft snout pressed against her clit as his tongue dragged across her spot on the inside. The base of his tongue was still thick enough to offer her some stretch, and with her clit assailed on all sides like this, she wouldn’t last long.

She reached down and gripped his horns like a lifeline, desperately rocking her hips.

“Oh T-Thor, yes, d-don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t—”

Ylva’s breath trembled and then became a scream—one so ecstatic and shameless that she never would have dared make such a noise anywhere near the village.

Krampus’s tongue gently stroked, extending her pleasure far longer than usual, letting all the tension quiver through her muscles and turn to pleasure.

Finally, she slumped in the chair, feeling utterly spent.

Warm, furry arms cradled her and Krampus pulled her down to the floor to nestle against his chest. He stroked her hair, and she thought she might die of happiness.

“Fuck,” she murmured.

“What?” he said, pressing his cheek against her head.

“I hate to admit it, but you were right. I can’t go back. Not after that.”

“Welcome to Hel,” Krampus crooned, and she could hear the smirk in his voice—but for once, she didn’t mind it. He’d earned it.

“Just one thing, though,” he continued. “I’d prefer you didn’t scream another god’s name when you cum.”

“Oh? I should scream, ‘Krampus’?”

“That’s the name Odin gave me. My mother named me Helson.”

Ylva blinked. “Hel is your mother?” The eponymous goddess ruled the realm and had nearly as storied a reputation as Odin.

“Mhm, and it’s as horrid as it sounds. She’s always glooming about. So when you cum…” His claw ran down the edge of Ylva’s jaw, and she shuddered. “Scream the name I gave myself. Kare.”

Ylva played it over her tongue. “Kah-reh.” It meant curved, curly. “Like your horns.” She reached up and stroked one of the ridged lengths.

Kare shuddered. “Careful, or I’ll have you screaming my name sooner rather than later.”

Ylva nestled against his chest. “Just give me… a minute…”

“Well, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say I must have satisfied you, little wolf.”

Ylva humphed and snuggled in, already drifting off.

Yuletide really was her favorite time of year.


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The Krampuslauf (Part II)

Continued from Part I


A few minutes into the longest night of the year, in the chill west wind, Ylva bent over the paddock fence with Hjalmar, a stable hand, plowing into her from behind.

The ponies snorted and snuffled through the snow, looking for grass, unbothered. Ponies fucked out in the open, after all. Ylva wished humans were more like that.

Hjalmar was one of Ylva’s more reliable partners in indecency, and he pounded right into that sweet spot so hard that Ylva saw stars.

“F-fuck, yes,” she whispered. “Harder!”

Hjalmar obliged, and Ylva’s vision blurred to sweet bliss.

Then, suddenly, he stopped and yanked her upright. “Someone’s coming,” he hissed in her ear.

That someone should be me, she thought.

Ylva and Hjalmar straightened their coats, which hid their state of undress, and leaned against the fence just as Hjalmar’s boss came around the corner of the barn. 

“Allo,” he said.

“Allo,” Hjalmar replied.

Ylva nodded.

The older man took his time sorting through the firewood piled behind the barn.

Ylva pressed her legs together, desperate for any sort of sensation. In response, her own wetness ran down between her thighs.

As Hjalmar’s boss started back in towards the barn, Ylva wiggled eagerly, eager to resume her activities.

“Aye, since you’re free, Hjalmar, I need yer help gettin’ the fires goin’.”

“O-Of course, sir.”

Hjalmar glanced back apologetically, then scurried after his master. With a little twinge of sadism, Ylva wondered how long he’d have to keep his coat on before he found a way to tuck his cock back in his trousers without anyone noticing.

She sighed, the puff of air trailing off on the wind. Ylva considered finishing what she and Hjalmar had started… but then a bell clanged from the town square.

Ylva grunted with frustration, then gave up on satisfaction and hasted towards the sound. The Krampus run would start soon, and she did not want to be late.


Ylva crunched across the snow and into the town square, sidling up to one of the basins of mulled wine simmering on a wood stove.

Baker Aki, a plump man with a full brown beard, distributed clay cups of the hot drink.

The cup was nearly in her hands before Aki narrowed his eyes and pulled it back.

“This is for the Krampus run,” he said.

Ylva turned to survey the crowd of men already drinking. They wore scraps of fur over their clothes and held homemade masks with frightening faces and long curved horns. Most of them were already totteringly drunk, with two of them pissing against a nearby building at that exact moment.

“They look like they’ve had enough,” Ylva said, “And I just wouldn’t want your hard work to go to waste.”

“Tch. Naughty child,” Aki said, but he handed her the cup with a wink, like she’d known he would.

“That’s their job to take care of, isn’t it?” Ylva said, blowing on the hot wine. She’d learned the hard way a few years back that Aki always served the wine so hot that if you took a drink too soon, you’d burn your tongue and taste cotton for days.

“Yet it doesn’t deter you from coming back every year,” Aki said.

Even from the time she was a toddler, Ylva had never been afraid of the Krampus run. She thought all the frightening faces were good fun. She liked how each costume was unique to the person who’d made it, even though they all represented the same character. Some looked almost like a real goat’s face, while others were exaggeratedly grotesque.

She’d made her own Krampus mask her seventh winter, pieced together with shed pony fur, old rags, and chicken bones for the horns.

Her father had smiled. Her mother had thrown it away. Ylva had never understood why only the men were allowed to have fun.

Every year, the brave children would dare each other to venture out during the Krampus run, then race away as soon as the men came near.

Ylva would dare the other boys to see how long they could spend in the middle of the crowd, where birch branches lashed and drunken elbows flew.

Her tenth winter, Ylva had emerged proudly with a black eye and a bloody cheek—winning a bet and losing permission to attend the run again.

Her eleventh winter is when Ylva learned how to sneak out.

Her fifteenth was when her breasts were coming in, and Ylva’s mother sat her down. Men do rude things to young women, Ylva. You have to be careful.

Ylva was not careful. They were rude, yes, but never cruel. And drunk enough to easily avoid.

Besides, Ylva liked the groping, the pushing, the birch branches flying—it was exciting.

As a man came up for more wine, Ylva scurried up the street in the direction she knew the Krampus run would start. There, a few teenagers and the bravest of the young children waited to see the start of the run.

Petrie was there, with his little brother hiding behind his leg.

“I thought you were old enough to be a Krampus,” Ylva said.

Petrie frowned and looked down at his brother. “The brat begged to come and Mama made me promise to watch him. The run is stupid, anyway. I don’t get why it’s such a big deal.”

“Tch. You must not be a real man, then.”

Petrie’s face went bright red as he correctly guessed at Ylva’s second meaning. “Maybe I do get it. You deserve a beating.”

“What are you waiting for?”

Petrie scowled. “Tch. You’re insufferable.”

“You seem to suffer me very willingly.”

“Ylva, I swear on—”

A horn sounded in the main square, and all the children went quiet.

Gudmund, the mayor, leaned hard on two of his friends and stood shakily on a box in the middle of the Krampus crowd. He cleared his throat, and the drunken men elbowed each other until most of them were paying attention.

“Odin, soaring through the sky on that mighty eight-legged stallion Sleipnir, brings blessings to the good and kind in spirit.” Gudmund slurred, but he gave the speech every year and knew it by heart. “But to the naughty and devious, another visitor calls…”

“Krampus!” cheered the men, putting on their masks.

“And we bring not gifts but…”

“Lashes!” they said, raising their twigs and branches high.

“Tonight, we Krampuses…”

“Run!” they jeered, turning the word into a threat as they started up the street.

Several of the children yelped, some with fear and some with excitement, as they turned and sprinted up the road.

The first stretch, they always ran together. Two blocks they’d sprint all-out, a clump of children and the mob of Krampuses behind them.

As they reached the edge of the village, a pair of Krampuses that had been lying in wait burst out of bushes on either side of the path.

Several children screamed with genuine fright, especially as the Krampuses lunged towards them and tousled the nearest children.

The children scattered, sprinting up every side street.

The ambush happened every year, so Ylva had already changed direction. The Krampuses also dispersed, and soon every street of the village was filled with yelps, screams, and growls as the costumed men chased the children.

Ylva slowed to enjoy a few lashes from the birch across her coat and stockings, then sped away again. It wasn’t hard to run faster than a drunk man, that was true, but Ylva was particularly fast.

One man noticed and chased after her in particular. She glanced over her shoulder, made a rude gesture, and picked up speed.

A block later, she glanced back, expecting to have gained distance—but he was even closer.

Excitement pounded through Ylva’s chest as she broke into an all-out sprint, weaving around several sharp corners that usually sent the men reeling. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the Krampus leap over a low pile of firewood with all the grace of a real goat, and he stayed right on her heels.

She turned a sharp corner, then another into a narrow alley between two buildings. Even though it was nearly pitch black, she wove deftly through the crates and jugs of oil, then cornered hard and slipped into an even narrower alleyway. By the lack of thumping and banging behind her, she was sure she was putting distance between them. Smirk on her lips, she angled for the opening back to the main street at top speed—

Then collided with a furry chest, bouncing off and skittering back into the alley.

Ylva reeled, breath knocked out of her. It couldn’t be the same Krampus, could it? He’d followed her into the alley, she was sure of it. He couldn’t have known which exit she would choose.

But also, why did he smell so good? Her brief collision with his chest had smelled of musk and vanilla and pine, not the mulled wine and piss that usually clouded around the Krampus run—and the slightest hint of rosemary from her token.

With the light of the town behind him, he was just a silhouette. Without the details of the costume, Ylva didn’t have much of a guess as to who was behind the mask.

“Aren’t good young women supposed to be safe at home on midwinter’s night?” he said.

“Isn’t Krampus supposed to be frightening?”

“Tch. Quite a mouth you have, don’t you? You must be very naughty and give your poor mother and father all sorts of heartache. Especially one as pretty as you…”

Ylva’s heart gave a little jump in her chest. He didn’t sound like anyone she recognized from the village. A visiting relative, maybe? A merchant? Or a wintering hunter? Regardless—someone new. Someone exciting. Ylva stood, dusted off her coat, and crossed her arms.

“So what if I’m pretty and naughty? What are you going to do? Beat me?” She half hoped he would. But he’d have to catch her first.

“I think I might,” he said.

Ylva turned to run back up the alleyway, but before she could make it three strides, her feet swept out from under her and she landed hard across fur-covered legs, musk and vanilla and pine surrounding her again.

“How are you so fast?” She hissed, trying to turn to get a closer look. But a firm hand on the back of her head forced her gaze downward and sent a thrill down her spine. She wasn’t sure if she could get away this time.

With his other hand, he turned up her coat and pulled down her stockings, exposing her ass to the chill night air.

Ylva hardly had time to gasp before a birch branch cracked across her bare skin—harder than she’d ever been hit before. Her whole body echoed the pain, like she’d just plunged into ice water. But then something strange happened—her toes curled under, her fingers grasped at the fur beneath them, her back arched. It hurt—there was no mistaking that. But it also felt good.

The second crack of the branch forced a whimper from between her lips, and then, as her wince relaxed, a subtle tingling drifted up her spine.

“Have you leaned your lesson?” The Krampus asked.

“Unlikely,” Ylva murmured.

Pain burst from the branch again, even sharper.

Ylva yelped, whole body going stiff and then melting deeper into that strange tingling sensation. She wanted more.

The next hit made her moan. It was a dangerous game, making noises like that while in a compromising position, but the Krampus seemed to take his duty seriously, keeping up a slow and steady set of lashes.

Before long, that tingling sensation rose to envelop Ylva, and she lost count. She thought she might melt away entirely into that soft fur and that cozy forest scent. 

Just when it was getting to be too much, when her ass was so sore that the sting barely subsided between strokes, the Krampus stopped.

Ylva floated for a long moment, every nerve glowing. A warm hand rubbed her ass, and she had never felt a sweeter touch.

And without the strike of the branch scrambling her brain every few seconds, she realized she was extremely aroused.

Ylva couldn’t help but wiggle.

“You’re not trying to escape, are you?”

“Fuck me,” Ylva murmured. She didn’t know who was behind the mask and she didn’t care—she just wanted cock. Now. She’d deal with the rest later.

The Krampus chuckled. “Well, you didn’t learn your lesson at all.” His fingers trailed down her ass and to her inner thigh.

Ylva trembled, and her breath caught.

His fingers cupped her cunt, just that light pressure sending sparks down every limb. Ylva moaned lowly. 

“In fact,” the Krampus continued. “You seem to be enjoying this.”

Her cunt was so slick that his fingers slid easily in.

Ylva whimpered and moaned, unable to stay quiet. Fuck, that felt good.

“Hm, I smell a male on you. Not the first time you’ve bent over today, I see. Naughty girl.”

Before Ylva could think much about the strange choice of words, the Krampus’s fingers pressed hard against that special spot and Ylva’s vision turned to stars.

Slowly, maddeningly, he lightened and then pressed again.

Ylva trembled, yearning. “Please…”

“I guess you do have some manners,” the Krampus said. “But whatever are you asking for?”

“M-more, harder, please…”

“Oh do you mean… like this?”

She meant exactly like that, but could not say as much because she was too busy screaming with ecstasy. She couldn’t tell exactly what he was doing, but she didn’t care. He somehow hit both that inner spot and her clit at the same time, and she writhed with ecstasy. Her fingers curled in his fur again, her back arched, her cunt clenched.

And that familiar heat tightened around her clit.

“Don’t stop,” she gasped. “Don’t stop, I’m—fuck!”

Ylva screamed as she came, the throbbing waves of pleasure too much to contain in her body. He kept up the attention on her cunt, drawing out her orgasm far longer than usual. 

As Ylva finally quieted in his lap, she noticed something hard throbbing against her stomach—almost certainly his cock.

But Ylva could hardly move. She was dizzy in the best possible way, tingling all over, whispers of pleasure still echoing in her cunt.

A warm hand cupped her ass again. 

“No sooner have you taken your lashings than you’re tallying up new ones…”

Clawed fingers stroked Ylva’s hair, and she shuddered.

“You deserve a proper punishing. Maybe then you’ll learn your lesson… but not if you stay here. Only one thing to do about it, then.”

Ylva’s world upended again and after a rustle and a blur of lights, she found herself in darkness, surrounded by rough burlap. The unyielding fabric pressed her into a tight ball as she lifted off the ground, weight swinging and then settling against a soft cushion that smelled like candlelit forest.

“Oh, are you ‘kidnapping’ me?” Ylva asked, pushing at the burlap—but it hardly gave her any room to move. “Very clever. Are we going back to your place?”

“You could say that,” the Krampus replied.

Ylva counted his steps, listening for anything she recognized, trying to guess where in the village he was taking her.

But from the moment she’d entered the sack, she hadn’t heard anything. No children yelping, no men howling, no branches slapping against window panes, no fire crackling.

Only the hush of fresh snowfall, the distant hooting of an owl, and the soft breath of the Krampus. 

Ylva must have been distracted, or spent longer over the Krampus’s lap than she thought, because the only other explanation was that the Krampus had in two steps gone from the alleyway to some place that wasn’t in the village at all.


Continued in Part III

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The Krampuslauf (Part I)

Yuletide was Ylva’s favorite time of year.

The smell of fresh greenery indoors, all the little candles twinkling among the boughs—it was like bringing the glimmering night sky indoors to the warmth of the crackling fire. Then there was the singing, the games, the feasts, the wine, the drunken kisses, the sneaking outside for a little bit more than a kiss… the long nights had their benefits. The cover of darkness made all sorts of delightful deviance possible. 

On the new moons, when you could hardly see your own hand in front of your face, she only bothered pulling the boys a few strides off the path before reaching down their trousers.

They called themselves “men”, but they were still barely twenty, so they were “boys” to her. She’d just passed her nineteenth name-day herself, but she’d hardly call herself a “woman”. Women practiced embroidery and fretted about dowries and thought about finding a husband. Girls were still wild, unkempt things with dirty feet and tangled hair.

It was the day before the solstice, and Ylva rode Petrie, the butcher’s son, on a snowbank behind the meat shop. Strands of wavy brown fell loose from her braid clung to her face. Her fur coat and tunic were half-unbuttoned, and Petrie grasped her bare breast.

The cold hardly bothered her—her body ached with so much heat. She loved being on top—she could rock her hips just-so and almost always cum.

“Y-Ylva, I’m close…”

“Me too,” she whispered. “J-just a few minutes more—oh, this feels so good…”

“M-minutes, Ylva… I’m not… I’m gonna…”

Ylva lifted her hips just in time—Petrie’s seed spilled out over onto his stomach.

Ylva huffed and plopped into the snow next to him.

“Why did you stop?” Petrie said, sounding disappointed.

“Because I don’t want to get pregnant. I told you that,” Ylva said. “Besides, you can touch it yourself. And not just now. Any time, did you know that? You won’t even go blind or turn into a goat or whatever your mother tells you.”

“Why do you care?”

“Because maybe if you did that a little more, you’d last longer,” Ylva snapped. “But if I’m the first hot thing to touch your dick in a week, of course you’re going to pop like a keg.”

“We-we could go again,” Petrie said, hopeful.

Ylva signed. “No, I’m not in the mood to suck cock.”

“Well, but… you were just…”

“No, now I’ve got to be careful. That…” gestured to the smear of white on Petrie’s cock and stomach, “Is what gets you pregnant, you know. You have to wash it with soap and make water before it’s safe again.”

“Says who?”

“Says Auntie Helda.”

“That old witch? You can’t trust her.”

“Oh? Didn’t you trust her when Grulna missed her bleeding last year?”

Petrie exhaled sharply. “We’re done here.”

“Good, I already said I wasn’t in the mood. I’m leaving first. And don’t bother slipping me another note until you can last longer than it takes to wash your hands, hm?”

Ylva stalked off into the snow. She knew the last jab was unnecessary—but so was the discombobulated arousal she was going to be stuck in for the next few hours. She could use her own hands, too, but sex was always such a strong sensation, it took a few hours before she was sensitive enough. Ylva buttoned up her coat and clomped out from behind the butcher’s shop.

Other villagers hustled to-and-fro, walking by the gold light of the candles in every window and the thin silver of the moon, finishing preparations for the solstice celebrations.

Seeing the massive evergreen in the center of the town square with every candle proudly lit, limbs sparkling with ornaments that held well-wishes for the next year, improved her spirits a tad.

Still, it was too cold to just stand around, and Ylva wasn’t quite ready to head home. That left only one place to go. 


As Ylva pushed into the little herb shop, the jingle of the bells on the door and the scent of dried sage and tarragon greeted her.

A fat calico cat jumped down from the windowsill and wove between Ylva’s legs, purring. She bent down and scratched the cat’s rump.

Auntie Helda stepped out from behind a shelf of pickled vegetables. The herbalist looked to be in her sixties, with white hair and soft, weather-worn skin—but she moved like someone not a day over thirty. She wasn’t Ylva’s aunt—she actually wasn’t anyone’s aunt, and as far as Ylva knew, she didn’t have any family in the village—but everyone called her ‘Auntie’ just the same.

“Ylva, my little sprig!” she called out. “Happy Yuletide.”

“Happy Yuletide.”

“Looking for anything particular today?” Auntie Helda’s eyes twinkled knowingly.

Ylva stopped by often for contraceptive teas whenever one of her partners failed to manage his timing. Auntie Helda had never judged her—by the contrary, the older woman seemed to approve.

But Ylva’s cautions had been successful this time. Wryly, she wondered which was worse—the cramps that the tea caused or this visceral frustration. It was almost enough to tempt her to let Petrie finish next time.

“Just a moment of peace and quiet today,” Ylva admitted.

Auntie Helda winked. “Understood. But before I leave you be… take this.”

She tied a cotton cord around Ylva’s neck, and at the base hung a sprig of dried rosemary.

“What’s it for?” Ylva asked.

“Protection,” Auntie Helda said. “And mostly it just smells good.”

Ylva smiled. She’d always appreciated how down-to-earth Auntie Helda was. “Any specific reason I need extra protection?”

“Perhaps,” Auntie Helda said. “It might just be the little insanities of an old woman, but… my bones are creaking like they used to in the old days.”

“During the convergence?”

Auntie Helda nodded. “The veil between worlds was much thinner, then. Sometimes, the heavens align just right… and Yuletide has always been when the veil was the thinnest.”

“So you think spirits might come through the veil? What kind?”

“Well, when I was a little girl, it was not men in masks that we ran from during the Krampus parade.”

“There’s a real Krampus?” Ylva breathed. She’d thought it was just another fairy tale to get children to behave.

Auntie Helda nodded. “I saw him, once. Dreadful, beautiful creature. But I wasn’t quite naughty enough for him to drag me away…” She sounded almost disappointed. “Now you, on the other hand…” Auntie Helda winked. “You might need to watch out.”

Ylva grinned. “I’ll be sure to do that.”


Ylva rolled around a ball of wool for the fat calico cat until she knew it was late enough that she’d be getting a lecture. She ruffled the cat’s fur one last time, then trudged home.

As cold as her hands were when she reached her home, she knew as she pushed the door open that it would bring her no relief.

“Tsk, Ylva!” barked her mother, who stirred a cast-iron pot of soup in the fire. She was plump and strong, her curly black hair going grey early—something she never missed an opportunity to blame it on Ylva.

“You’re late and tracking mud in,” her mother snapped.

“Sorry Mama,” Ylva murmured insincerely as she back-tracked and wriggled out of her boots.

Her hand was mere inches from the knob of the door to her room when her mother said, “Ylva, I need to talk to you.”

Ylva sighed, tromped back to the living room and plopped down in front of the fire. If she was going to be lectured, she may as well be comfortable.

“Priest Jorin told me he caught you engaged in certain activities with one of the candle lighters… again.”

“So?”

“It’s like you’re trying to get caught!”

She was, actually. She thought it was funny how mad it made Priest Jorin.

“So you’re fine with it as long as I don’t get caught?”

Ylva’s mother sputtered. “That’s not what I’m saying. Ylva, I’m worried for you.”

“You’re always worried for me. If this is about no husband wanting me—that’s fine. I don’t want one.”

“Ylva, it’s not just about you. It’s about starting your own household, not being a burden on this one!”

That one stung. Ylva looked away and forced her shoulders to shrug.

“Tch. Ungrateful child.” Ylva’s mother whipped the spoon through the stew.

“So if that’s everything…” Ylva stood, stepping towards her room.

“Peel the potatoes. And do it right this time.”


Ylva’s mother was unrelenting in her demands through dinner, when she ranted to Ylva’s father about their daughter’s latest deviances.

Ylva’s father murmured an obligatory “Listen to your mother,” but his mind was clearly still in the wood shop, dreaming up new joineries or something.

Ylva thought his work was interesting, but she resented that he seemed to care more about it than her. Her own mind wandered back to the snowdrift behind the meat shop. She shifted restlessly under the table, her cunt still wet and aching from her earlier denial.

Finally, her parents climbed the ladder to their loft, and she was allowed to go to bed. She opened the door to the closet that she’d taken over as her room, only barely large enough for the cot. It was the only door in the little house, other than the entrance.

She flopped down and pulled the door closed behind her. It wasn’t much. But it put a sheet of wood between her and her parents, and that was all she needed to plunge her hand into her cunt.

The denial always made the relief that much sweeter, but Ylva was not usually one for delayed gratification. The Petrie in her imagination could last as long as she needed, and Ylva bit her pillow to stay quiet as the release rolled through her. It took the edge off, but a restless horniness still bubbled under her skin.

When Ylva finally drifted off to sleep, she dreamed of endlessly running, the shadow of a birch branch always close behind her.


Continued in Part II

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2022 in Review – Updates & Musings

Quiet as the site has been this year, rest assured that I’ve been cookin’ up some goodness behind-the-scenes.

First off, I for-real published an eBook in 2022 and forgot to post it here!

At first, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to get into eBook publishing—it’s intimidating. And while I’ve remained sure that I want to steer fully clear of a certain unlimited reading subscription, and I’m glad I didn’t rush into eBooks right away, it really is a much better format for long-form work, both for reading and for publishing.

Plus, the idea of having my covers in a storefront gets me excited, so I’m going to keep doing what’s gotten me this far–chasing the dopamine.

Towards that end, I have a ~50k word werewolf manuscript that’s just pending final copyediting and cover tweaks before I publish it as an eBook. I had intended a spooky season release there, but life got hectic. I’m really, really excited to share this one–it’s an especially quintessential expression of my signature blend of hot, heartfelt, and philosophical.

I also started a Tumblr! There will be some original shorts there, mostly as responses to writing prompts, and it’ll be another place to get news about new stories–and chat a bit, if you’d like! I’m excited that Tumblr seems to be reliably allowing spicy stories again, since it’s very much my vibe overall. Feel free to follow me there, and if you have any requests you’ve been sitting on, my main blog allows anon asks! There’s a chance I change the main blog URL, so if that link breaks, you’ll always be able to find me through monstrous-morsels.

Just in time for Christmas, I’ll be publishing a new Krampus short. And for no seasonal reason whatsoever, I’ve got a first draft done of a ~20k novella inspired by a certain strange plant in a certain little shop–so stay tuned for that too.

Further out on the horizon, I’m most of the way through a first draft of current-day farm-themed monster-loving goodness, and have an outline together for a sequel to the werewolf story. We might even see some of that before this time next year! 🙈

Most importantly… wishing you pleasurable holidays & a frisky new year~

♥ Bethany

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